Mixtapemotions

  • "Glory/Us" by Acceptance, Wednesday, February 28, 2021

    One rainy day in March 2005, I saw Acceptance‘s Phantoms in Walmart’s Pop/Rock section. I picked up the album and wondered who this band was. I looked at the back and saw the track listing. There was a song titled “This Conversation Is Over,” which was the same name as one of the songs on The Sims 2 University expansion pack. Could it be the same group? I rarely bought albums without listening to them first. That’s why I have so many Christian Rock albums. The Family Christian Store had a sample CD for almost every album sold in their stores. However, albums sold in major retailers might let you preview a few of the songs. I don’t think the preview was available for this album. Nevertheless, I bought this album and put it into the fickle CD player in my 1991 Toyota Corolla. Immediately it became one of the most played albums of the next two years along with Anberlin’s Never Take Friendship Personal, Falling Up’s Crashings and Dawn Escapes, Day of Fire’s self-titled, and Mozart’s Requiem.

    HONESTY WAITS HERE FOREVER. The music you listen to as a teenager to your early twenties is the most impactful. If you listened to music of your time, there’s something of a big-brother factor (not the Orwellian kind) about these bands that are just a few years older than you, making music that’s now considered cool by other like-minded people. Then put that teenager behind the wheel of his first car, send him off to the store, or make him tote his younger siblings around. This was the American spirit of freedom the founding fathers had no idea about. I love that music is so accessible now. I pay $11 a month and have access to millions of songs. But I spent a lot more than $11 every month on maybe three albums at most. I didn’t listen to as many songs as I do now, but I listened to music a lot more often. Music was everything. Albums were meant to be listened to with minimal skips. Sure sometimes you just want to play the hits, but for long rides between the town where you take your little sister to school and the town where you go to school, there’s a lot of time to listen to the full album. Albums like Phantoms were great because you didn’t have to skip a track.

    COLD AND WIRED. One of the reasons this album stayed in my usual rotation from Junior to Senior year is that it’s both seasonal and year-round. The album was released in late February and I discovered it in March. Many of the early tracks on the album have a springtime sound. These songs are more piano-driven, but by the middle of the album, it turns more into a rock record (summer?). Then songs like “In the Cold” and “Breathless” feel autumny. The final track, “Glory/Us” is the coldest track on the album, perfect for winter. The lyrics of this song deal with the ending of something that immediately leads to a rebuilding. Jason Vena’s vocals, the band’s instrumentation, and Aaron Sprinkle’s production make this a beautiful and hopeful ballad, ending a cult-favorite album for a band that was ultimately cursed by the music industry. The band broke up in August of 2005 following Columbia pulling the initial release from the stores due to a spyware issue with the CD enhancements. Band members went their separate ways. Vena appeared on some tracks, but left the music industry. The other members joined other projects, notably Christian McAlhaney joined Anberlin, giving them a bit of an Acceptance sound from New Surrender on. Because of the cult-success of this record, the band got back together in 2015, though not in a full-time capacity. 
     

  • "Hang on Love" by The Wedding, Saturday, February 27, 2021

     

    Back to Cornerstone, either 2007 or 2008. One dusty afternoon we found ourselves in a tent to see a surprise competition. Like most music festivals, there were different tiers of bands bands playing. At Cornerstone there were groups like Skillet, Flyleaf, Switchfoot, and Relient K who would frequent the main stage. However, small groups like The Wedding played in tents. Every year friends attending made their schedules–the must bands, the bands you may have heard on the radio, the ones with cool names or pictures or bios. So one of The Wedding’s shows made our list. I had heard their songs from their first self-titled album on RadioU. Songs like “Morning Air, “Wake the Regiment,” and “Move This City.” I thought of them as the Fall Out Boy of Christian music.

    I’M BEGGING YOU TO STAY. It was quite interesting to say the least. The Wedding and another band Wavorly, had been on the schedule at least three times each. The two bands decided to hold a competition to see which was the better band. They would each play four of the other bands songs and whichever band was cheered the loudest would play one of their own songs as an encore. I think Wavorly won the competition, but as a newcomer to both bands, the competition was confusing.  My friend bought The Wedding’s CD, and I bought Wavorly’s album. On the way back from Cornerstone we listened to both bands back to back. We discovered that Wavorly’s music and lyrics were a little bland. The Wedding’s album had better songs but they weren’t as musically interesting as when they played Wavorly. The Wedding seemed to give more life to Wavorly’s music.  The Wedding stuck around for a while. They went on hiatus and then they came back, reforming on Tooth & Nail Records. They released an EP and the LP which contains the song of the day, No Direction. The band never saw the levels of success of the bands they opened for. 

    THIS COULD BE THE BEST WE’VE EVER HAD. I discovered this song last year. Ask any teacher about how they’re handling the COVID 19 pandemic, and you’ll probably get a rant you’ve never wanted to hear. I’ll spare you that for another day. Needless to say, I was quite discouraged. Work had little reward. I thought about changing careers every day. I felt like giving up and just collecting a paycheck. Motivation was a daily struggle. If it was like that for me, just think about students. A greater percentage of students used the class time for phone games and they lacked any forward thinking for after the pandemic. As far as we know, college applications would still exist as would jobs in some form. Next week the school year begins in South Korea. “If you’re tired love rest your head,” but next month we go to war against apathy. Hang on!

    https://genius.com/The-wedding-hang-on-love-lyrics

  • "Tell Me How" by Paramore, Friday, February 26, 2021

    2017’s After Laughter is arguably the best Paramore record both lyrically and musically. Musically, it’s a pop album borrowing synths from the ’80s, interesting drum arrangement, and some pensive guitars here and there. And although most songs are in major keys, lead singer and lyricist Haley Williams masterfully disguises some of the band’s most difficult with smiles and summer vibes. The most telling track is “Fake Happy,” but also songs like “Pool” and “Rose-Colored Boy” show this beautiful confusion of being the life of the party and dealing with other things inside. The name of the album itself is telling. Williams explains that the meaning is the expression the faces of a room full of people stop laughing. Smiles start to fade, maybe some tears are wiped away. While you may debate whether this band fits into their emo punk rock sound, the lyrics are an unadulterated emotional roller coaster.

    I CAN’T CALL YOU A STRANGER, BUT I CAN’T CALL YOU. Winter days are the time for last tracks of the album. Cold days in doors with instrumentals make you reflect on life and relationships. This piano ballad doesn’t pretend to be happy, like most of the rest of the album. With lyrics that reference the lawsuits and turmoil that the band had been through as well as the personal cost of losing friendships over differences of opinions, Williams speaks her truth, and it’s a story that’s all too relatable. I wrote about the Paramore controversy last month, but the song that I had chosen was before the great disagreement and the lawsuits took place. This song is the last song on the latest (possibly last) Paramore record, which is basically a war story. The contributors at Genius Lyrics do a great job breaking down the lyrics of this song with quotes from both parties. When a relationship sours, there’s no real healing.

    YOU MAY HATE ME, BUT I CAN’T HATE YOU. “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you,  leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23-23). This song reminds me of a sermon I heard growing up based on this passage. The pastor said that if you can’t settle your disagreement, you are not ready for heaven. This bothered me to the core. What was even more disturbing was that the people who agreed with this message the most had a blindspot for resenting a neighbor or family member. I want to live as a peacemaker, but sides in a disagreement can’t always be glossed over. Sometimes the reconciliation with a brother or sister takes years and the sacrifice sits at the altar for years. “I’ve got my convictions, [and you’ve got yours]… and no one’s winning. Tell me how I’m supposed to feel about you now?” The outro ends the song with some hope, as if Williams comes to a moment of realization that friends don’t have to make up, but that letting go of the hard feeling is freeing. 

  • "Falling Like the Stars," James Arthur, February 25, 2021

    Apple Music now has endless music after the album, song, or playlist you were listening to has ended, the algorithm will suggest songs you might like. After a Shawn Mendes single, Apple suggested a track from Taylor Swift’s Folklore and then this song. I had never heard of James Arthur, but the song reminded me of moments in my long distance relationship and about a time early in my relationship when we got food poisoning from some bad chicken. The song had a sweet, This Is Us kind of feeling to it, so I thought that might be a nice thing to write about today. But, as another part of my project is research, I wanted to know about the artist, and what I found didn’t feel so touchy feely, but something nonetheless that I have wanted to process since I’ve started writing again.

    WE’RE FALLIN’ LIKE THE STARS. I’ve been wondering these days about cancel culture. What causes a stumble and what causes a fall? How can we know the difference? And finally, how do we deal with problematic trailblazers, acknowledging cultural significance, but critiquing the underlying issues? James Arthur was the winner of Britain’s X Factor. He had a background in Alternative Rock, Pop, and Hip Hop, and seemed to be ready for his fifteen minutes of fame, but hit a bit of controversy. After he released his 2013 debut, he released a diss track which included a homophobic slur, and a hip hop project which included violent lyrics. So many people were outraged with Arthur that iTunes even refunded money for the purchased album. This caused Arthur to be dropped by his record label. As I read this story, I thought that if this had happened today. Not only had the artist offended his fans, he cost the music industry money.

    AND I’M NOT SCARED TO SAY THOSE WORDS. Today, I found out that one of my former colleagues was blocked from Facebook for spreading fake news. This is not at all surprising, and if anyone was a candidate for Facebook censure, it would be this guy. We live in a world for very loud talking heads right now, and false information shouldn’t be used on any side in this war of words. James Arthur was able to repair his career with apologies and time to distance himself from the dumb decisions he made musically. But this got me thinking about the problematic songs that graced the Top 40 as little as ten years ago. Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” slide under the door just before the #MeToo movement. I’m cringing remembering 30h3!’s song “Don’t Trust Me,” and come to think of it, the whole album is pretty toxic. And although it wasn’t a single, we should remember on Katy Perry’s first album she calls out a boyfriend who is “so gay [but doesn’t] even like boys.” In the age of so-called “Cancel Culture,” I wonder what we are supposed to do with our past. Do we memorialize it? Do we act like it never happened? Do we apologize for it? I certainly don’t want someone to find my old beliefs, copy them from MySpace, and post them on Twitter. Then there’s television. Disney+ just released The Muppet Show with a content warning, explaining that some of the humor might make people uncomfortable. They also pulled two episodes which had content that they found to be unacceptable for release. But I wonder, should that content be available? If not on Disney+, then somewhere? How are we ever going to analyze the past if we keep burning the primary documents on which our history books are based.  Let’s proceed with caution, shall we?

    https://genius.com/James-arthur-falling-like-the-stars-lyrics

  • “Streets of Philadelphia” by Bruce Springsteen, February 24, 2021

     

    There is little that my parents agree on musically, but one thing they DO agree on is that whenever Bruce Springsteen comes on the radio, they change the station. For years, all I knew from Springsteen was “Born in the USA,” and the song didn’t resonate with me, so I too passed on The Boss. But when I watched Philadelphia, I heard a different side of Springsteen. Yes, the smokey voice was slightly off-putting in other songs, but how it met with the keys and faint lead guitar, and coalescing with the lyrics to created an emotional and spiritual experience. Last year, I listened to his song “I’m on Fire,” a lot. Though somewhat problematic, Springsteen masterfully uses imagery to transport the listener into the experience. Last year when I was returning to Korea just before the pandemic, I watched several movies on the plane. Two of them stuck out. The first was Where’s My Roy Cohn, the story of Trump’s villainous lawyer who died in the mid-80s of AIDS. The other movie was Blinded By the Light, a true story about how the lyrics of Bruce Springsteen helped two teenagers reconcile the tensions between their South Asian family-life upbringings and Western culture. Bruce Springsteen’s lyrics have been influential on many of the musicians I listen to. Could my parents have been wrong?

    I WAS UNRECOGNIZABLE TO MYSELF. I grew up in an Adventures-in-Odyssey-listening home. My mom would also listen to Focus on the Family with James Dobson. Adventures in Odyssey is a radio drama produced by Focus on the Family. The aim of the foundation is to instill conservative Christian values in children and adults. Adventures in Odyssey was so well dramatized with professional voice actors who worked for Disney and even The Simpsons. Sound production was also great. I still can see the characters and places I imagined from the show. But I didn’t realize how indoctrinated I had become with a very particular interpretation of scripture. Topics ranged from Bible stories to history lessons (slanted to the right) to learning how to obey your parents or teachers. But they also dealt with prayer in school, divorce, evolution, role playing games, the occult, and too many others to name. One special episode even dealt with abortion. As I grew up, I learned what Focus on the Family was teaching parents. Adventures in Odyssey dealt with issues from children’s perspectives. Children have no control over if their parents get divorced. However, Dobson used the adult program to fuel the culture war. Hollywood and secularism were winning, and issues of abortion, homosexuality, and the removal of God from public schools were the program’s bread and butter. 
    AIN’T NO ANGEL GONNA GREET ME. Philadelphia is named after the ancient city located in present day Turkey. The name means, “brotherly love,” coming from phileo which is one of the Greek words for love. However, the AIDS crisis was not about brotherly love. President Reagan treated the epidemic with silence. As more and more kept dying, the epidemic struck closer to home. Celebrities, gay men, women and children who received blood transfusions–anyone could be a victim of the virus. AIDS which had been something only heard about on TV was impacting real people. Hollywood responded slowly, too. However, 1993’s Philadelphia, humanized AIDS for many Americans. America’s most beloved actor, Tom Hanks, portrayed a gay man dying of AIDS who sues his place of employment over unlawful termination. Despite Hanks’s powerful onscreen portrayal, the religious right continued to fire back, doubling down, calling the plague “God’s punishment.” And 40 years removed from the start of the AIDS epidemic, I cannot hear the voice of Christ in all the noise. The media showed us the cries of suffering of millions of people who died alone. I hear the blaring silence of the countless dead who cannot speak for themselves. I hear the voice of the accuser, the Biblical Satan, who speaks like a Pharisee in the New Testament. The AIDS crisis was a failure of brotherly love. The church turned a cold shoulder to the down-and-out. Few Christian singers would touch this demographic to show radical love to the world. But Springsteen, Hanks, and Washington showed Jesus to “The Streets of Philadelphia.”

  • "Twilight of My Youth" by Tyler Burkum, Tuesday, February 23, 2021

     

    At 17, Tyler Burkum joined one of the most successful Christian Rock bands of the ’90s, Audio Adrenaline on their Some Kind of Zombie album cycle. Guitarist, Bob Herdman was getting busy with his venture, Flicker Records (Pillar, Fireflight, Kids in the Way). In addition to the need for a new guitarist, lead singer Mark Stuart’s vocal problems were getting worse, often losing his voice on stage. The band needed someone to step in on vocal duties. The band’s 2001 album Lift featured songs with Burkum and Stuart sharing vocal duties. The song “Ocean Floor” was the single that introduced Burkum as a prominent member of the band. The band’s follow up, Worldwide featured Burkum singing lead on more songs, taking the band in a poppier and CCM-radio friendly direction. But the days of Audio A were numbered. The band called it quits in 2007, mostly due to Stuart’s worsening vocal problems. And although the band reunited with Kevin Max on lead vocals, Burkum didn’t join this chapter of the band.

    SEARCHING THE RUBBLE. Burkum’s tenure with Audio Adrenaline was the closest the Minnesotan guitarist would get to fame. After the group disbanded in 2007, Burkum went under the radar. But he certainly didn’t get lazy. Even while in Audio Adrenaline, Burkum was working behind the scenes with other musicians in the studio and on the stage. He worked toured with the !Hero Rock Opera Tour, played with Pillar, and recorded on Jennifer Knapp’s Lay It Down album. After Audio A, he joined the band Leagues, covered last month, and became a touring guitarist for Mat Kearny, and recorded with NEEDTOBREATHE, Toby Mac, and Andrew Peterson. Burkum hasn’t released much solo work, just two albums on Apple Music, released nine years apart. 

    A VAIN, VAIN MAN. The last track on 2019’s Strange Light, “Twilight of My Youth” strikes me for several reasons. I had a coworker two years ago who was an awful teacher. All he cared about was looking like a teacher–and dressing like a K-pop star. I’ve seen this before young adults, but this guy was approaching 40. This wouldn’t be a problem, except this coworker was ambitious and seemed to be out to take my job. This song also makes me think about Burkum, who seemingly peaked young. What else is there after world tours and large music festivals? Then I think about myself. Am I stagnating? Did I peak too soon in terms of my success at work? Can I strive for something bigger, even though the connections I once had are forgetting me? Like many closing tracks on records, the end refrain of this song, with its lullaby-like piano leaves the listener asking these questions: What am I going to do with the rest of my time? Am I living too much in the past?

  • “True Faith” by New Order, Monday, February 22, 2021

    Since I’m on the subject of family, I thought I would share another memory. Buried under twenty years of dust in my parents garage lies an old Yamaha keyboard. It was my dad’s Christmas present to my mom in the mid-90s. This model came with 100 recorded instruments, 100 styles of drum beats, everything from foxtrot to metal, and 25 or so recorded songs. It was a pretty typical family keyboard, but it kept me entertained for years. Although I started playing guitar at the age of 12, I had spent a long time messing around on that keyboard trying to make music. I loved playing the keyboard but hated how fake the instruments sounded. Strings, brass, woodwinds–all sounded like the vegetarian version served at camp meeting tasted. Still, that keyboard played such a crucial role for music in my life.   

    WHEN I WAS A VERY SMALL BOY. I got my first taste of synthesizers from my keyboard. I learned about the Orchestra Hit. It was the sound used in the hits by Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys, and *NSync. Other synths were used in hits like Eiffel 65’s “Blue” or Darude’s “Sandstorm.” And of course all the computer games I was playing had similar synth music. But as the 2000s took full swing, I started to feel frustrated with the family keyboard. My friend’s family had a newer model, and their instruments sounded 2% realer. This didn’t stop me from playing it or using it to create weird songs with my sister on a tape player. I was fully loving keyboard synthesizers without appreciating their origin story. My mom told me one day that I was going to start guitar lessons. I just said okay, but part of me was screaming out that I wanted to learn piano first. Why? Michael W. Smith was so cool back in the ’90s. I wanted to learn how to record trippy music like on Delirious’s Mezzamorphis album. And there was Skillet’s Invincible and Alien Youth albums. And Linkin Park was getting popular. And Earthsuit’s Kaleidoscope Superior had me wondering how could Paul Meany rap so fast when playing the keyboard. I took guitar and loved it, but rock without keys is kinda boring.

    MY MORNING SUN IS THE DRUG THAT LEADS ME NEAR TO THE CHILDHOOD I LOST. I talked about my history with New Order last month and about my initial disdain for the ’80s sound earlier this month. Anberlin was certainly my gateway drug to New Order’s discography, as they released a cover of this song as the third single from their New Surrender album cycle, rereleasing their album with a bunch of B-Sides. A college professor I worked for loved this song, so I started getting into New Order. I don’t remember when I first heard this song, but I steered away from it for years because of the old synthesizer sounds. I thought it sounded like something I could have recorded on my mom’s keyboard. But years down the road, I see that’s the charm of these old synth classics. The song opens with larger-than-life electronic drums. The keyboard keeps a dark atmosphere throughout most of the song until the end, shifting into a major key. New Order is the real deal. Pop and rock musicians look to their synth-pop songs for inspiration. 
    Music Video:

    Anberlin cover

    My Calvins commercial featuring “True Faith”:

    Parody with James Corden: 

  • "Up&Up" by Coldplay, Sunday, February 21, 2021

     

    I remember the first time I saw Coldplay‘s video for “Trouble” on MTV. That was my introduction to the band. I thought that this interesting Radiohead-like pop band could be an interesting addition to music scene. The band grew out of the dreary piano ballads and has cultivated a diverse sound. Their sophomore album, A Rush of Blood to the Head was much more inclined to pop music. What the band started to perfect after ARoBttH was the use of the recording studio. X & Y wasn’t so much about the talent of the live music, but what kinds of sounds could be produced in the studio. Their follow-up Viva la Vida or Death and All His Friends extended those ideas with string sessions. Mylo Xyloto saw the band collaborate with Rhianna, and next month I’ll talk about this album’s collaboration with Beyonce.  By the band’s seventh album A Head Full of Dreams, listeners should be aware Coldplay isn’t recording songs to get back to stadium tours. They’re composing an album with full intentionality, and the producer is as much a part of the band as any member. The video for this song reminds me of a calendar my mom bought me. Every month had an optical illusion painted by surrealist painter Rob Gonsalves.


    IT’S IN YOUR BLOOD. Today is my mom’s birthday, so I’m dedicating a song to her. In my teenage years I vowed to never be like my mom, as far as her musical tastes go. My mom is the daughter of a concert violinist and violist. But being forced to take piano and violin lessons, my mom grew to hate playing music. This was a major contrast to my musical upbringing because once I started playing guitar, I practiced for hours. As far as listening to music, I grew up around music. From kids songs both religious and secular to soothing-classically inspired hymns, my mom played the same music over and over again. I remember when she got her ten CD set of baroque classics, which included The Four Seasons, Water Music, The Brandenburg Concertos and other works by Bach, Handel, Telemann, and others. When we moved to North Carolina, she started listening to light Contemporary Christian Music. It was just something that was on in the car. But slowly, as the kids got older, she started listening to some of her favorites from the ’70s and ’80s. We listened to Elton John’s greatest hits, Journey, Chicago. She wouldn’t tolerate anything new. Until she heard Coldplay’s “Viva la Vida.” From then on she was hooked on Coldplay and slowly she started listening to other “newer” music too.

    FIXING UP A CAR, DRIVING IT AGAIN. In my early 30s, I understand my mom a lot better, as far as music goes. I’m writing a blog about mostly old music which is connected to some of my memories. It’s exhausting to keep up with the teens on Tick Tok to find out what’s cool and what’s not. My idea of new music is going onto Apple Music and finding albums I missed from artists I already know. When she heard “Viva La Vida” she bought the album and it’s all that we listened to in the car for about a year. She listened to their other albums, including this one. My dad complained about “too much Coldplay” on a family trip up to New York, which sparked a fight for miles until they found something else to fight about. Family road trips are now a thing of the past, but you never forget being cramped into the back seat of a Toyota Corolla with your two sisters, my mom’s music blaring. As a teenager you think it will keep going forever. Happy birthday, Mom!

    https://genius.com/Coldplay-up-up-lyrics

  • "(*Fin)" by Anberlin, Saturday, February 20, 2021

    February 20, 2007, Anberlin released the album that defined their career. Most fans don’t remember the release dates of their favorite albums. As for me, I only remember two album releases off the top of my head. The first is P.O.D.‘s Satellite because it was released on September 11, 2001. The other album release I know by heart, as do the fans of Anberlin, is Cities. Anberlin fans call February 20th “Cities Day,” still to this day. In the three years that I’ve been doing this playlist project, I’ve celebrated Cities with a different track. In 2019, it was “A Whisper & A Clamour.” Last year it was “Hello Alone,” as I dealt with the depression of what looked like Armageddon. This year, I’m choosing the closing track, “(*Fin),” but I’ll choose the livestream More to Living Than Being Alive version released yesterday on AppleMusic and Spotify.


    WE’RE NOT QUESTIONING GOD, JUST THOSE HE CHOSE TO CARRY HIS CROSS. Everyone remembers 2015 when #MeToo swept the world. Victims of sexual abuse used this platform to call out not only those who wronged them, but also the systems in place that both allowed and enabled sexual abuse to happen. Shortly after #MeToo’s popularity, #ChurchToo and #SilenceIsNotSpiritual appeared as a platform for people of faith both currently practicing and no longer practicing to call out spiritual leaders who had abused their power. Little by little society has become more educated about abuse, and not only sexual abuse. I’m not a survivor of sexual abuse, but I think it’s time to start taking spiritual abuse quite seriously. WebMD defines spiritual abuse as “Any attempt to exert power and control over someone using religion, faith, or beliefs.” Last year when I started listening to the You Have Permission podcast, I was able to put a name to the trauma I experienced in the name of religion. 
    THE UNHOLY GHOST DOESN’T TELL MARY AND WILLIAM EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR. Like white supremacy and misogyny, spiritual abuse is embedded in the church so much so that people can fairly call the whole system abuse. Readers of the Bible are not without textual evidence that the clergy have used for almost 2,000 years to extort money or manipulate followers to do things that they would otherwise not do and threatening hell to those who don’t believe or do. It’s a tale as old as Western culture itself of the child molesting preacher or the “do as I say, not as I do” cult leader who manipulates believers into bed. But it’s deeper than that. It’s the belief that’s taught that your church is the only correct one, and all who stop attending are lost. My church taught that non-believers weren’t going to burn for an eternity in hell, but if they left they were talked about in such a judgmental way that I was always scared to leave the system. “Jesus gave it all for you, don’t you think you should give or do _______,” was the final persuasion point of sermons. I mean, how can a child say no to doing that for Jesus. Finally, there may have not been eternal hell, but there was certainly the end times to keep you up at night. And as a further manipulation tactic, we were taught that no one knows who will be saved until the very end. So you better watch out, you better not pout, you better not cry, I’m telling you why…Jesus is coming, and you’ll only have to endure being hunted down and watch your family members be killed in front of you and if you love something or someone too much, you’ll be too attached to the world in order to be saved, they you can’t be resurrected and live forever with God. “

    TAKE WHAT YOU WILL, WHAT YOU WILL “(*Fin)” is a song for processing these feelings. Stephen Christian has sorted out his beliefs, but not everyone has or will. The cliche is that Christians can write songs in minor keys, but they must end on a major chord. This song ends Anberlin’s darkest album on a major chord, but I’m not sure if the question is really answered. I’ve gone through several iterations of my own faith, and still, I feel that the question isn’t answered. Stephen Christian is now a pastor in Florida when he’s not signing in Anberlin or Anchor & Braille. His own father was a pastor, the stories in (*Fin) have to do with his constant moving around as a child and the strange teachings he heard in church. So is this a story of continuing the system of abuse or dismantling and repairing it. I hope that it’s the latter.

     

  • "All These Things I've Done" by The Killers, Wednesday, February 19, 2021

    Today was on course to be a perfect day. Solved a banking problem, tried a new Starbucks beverage, got a new shield for my new MacBook Air, tried Shake Shack for the first time (so far the only place in Korea to get beef hotdogs as far as I know), shopping in the department store, bought soft tofu covered sushi for dinner and took it to go. But in the middle of this rare Covid shopping trip, I get an upsetting Kakao text from a coworker about work. So in the middle of vacation, my mind has been corrupted with work. And it’s not like it was anything urgent. Like a text from work on a perfect vacation day, the hopeful message of this song is about the struggle through adversity. I heard this song today in Shake Shack, and it seems to fit the mood best.

    DON’T YOU PUT ME ON THE BACK BURNER. “Somebody Told Me” was my first introduction to this band. You couldn’t miss the song, even if you only listened to the radio occasionally. Brandon Flowers sounded so much like The Cure’s Robert Smith, and the band helped to make the ’80s cool again. I didn’t like the song very much, though. I thought it was too worldly in high school. Is Brandon Flowers saying his ex became a lesbian? Oh, my evangelical times. “All the Things I’ve Done” was the band’s third single, but I never heard it until college. It was a classroom in one of the Christian high schools I had to observe for my Intro to Secondary Education class. The song was played in a film for Invisible Children, an organization whose aim is to raise awareness about child soldiers in Central Africa. Later I heard this song everywhere as my college also got involved with the organization. 

    YOU GOTTA HELP ME OUT. From an early age, I’ve been fascinated with Mormonism. From the religion’s history founded in the United States, to the narratives taught in the Book of Mormon involving American history, to the beliefs of the people, to the quiet influence it’s had on Hollywood, music, writing, and politics–it’s a story of America that parallels my own religious tradition of Seventh-day Adventism. Reading the lyrics of this song, many commentators reference the Bible and Mormon symbolism, pointing out that this song is a struggle between the sex and drinking of rock ‘n’ roll and the straight-and-narrow of a rigorous faith tradition. Following Flowers career both in his solo work and with The Killers, I wonder about this struggle. Flowers is a very public figure and he is devoted to his beliefs. But many of his lyrics paint a different picture than the squeaky clean Mormon image. This could be my complete misunderstanding of the religion. What I do get from Flowers is honesty dealing with love, life, art, and religion. Perhaps we may someday look to him as we look to Bono. Only “time, truth, and hearts” will tell.